That Worries Me

I will enter 21 weeks this Saturday. The problem is, I am not sure if I have felt movements from my baby. How is my baby doing? Is he/she growing well? This situation puts me in anxiety.

Last Saturday, before bed, I started to worry. I barely close my eyes to sleep. On the next day, I asked husband to send me to seek for a Dr. Ultrasound done and Alhamdulillah, my baby is doing fine. I saw my baby's heartbeat and that was a quick relief. 

As of today, I am still in a state of confusion. The nurses & the gynae of Klinik Kesihatan keep asking me if I have felt any movements. I don't have any clues as this is my first time. My friends said, the movement is like a sensation of a butterfly flapping its wing so hard and rapidly. I do felt like a gas moving quickly in my womb. I think that came from the movement. Please help me to calm myself. I feel discourage. -_-"

Bakal Ibu Terlampau

Aku ni melampau tau. Dulu sebelum preggy siap berangan bila preggy nanti nak buat maternity photo shoot la. Siap fikir props apa yg aku akan guna nanti. Lepas tu siap dok prepare nama2 anak lelaki & perempuan. Haihhh.. Pathetic tak aku?

Tapi sekarang lagi melampau-lampau. Aku siap dah terbayang nak buat majlis aqiqah & cukur jambul kat rumah mama. Nak ada buaian berendoi. Aku dah fikir tema color siap2. Kalau baby girl, dia akan pakai maxi dress aku masa baby dulu yg color peach & headband putih, family aku pun pakai peach. Kalau baby boy, aku nak pakaikan dia baju melayu light yellow, maka family aku pun akan pakai light yellow. Tak ketinggalan doorgift nak bagi pulut kuning, kari ayam & kurma sebab nanti aku cun2 habis confinement hujung Mei, early June or mid June boleh buat majlis. See, berangan kan.. Or lebih kepada plan ni? #tepukdahi

Lepas tu lagi berangan nak celebrate 1st birthday kat rumah baru kami. Siap dah berangan menu apa, kek macam mana, deko macam mana nak buat. Hailah anak, mummy awak ni outrageous sangat tau!

Lepas tu, aku siap dah fikir education anak aku. Umur 4 tahun aku nak enroll dia kat islamic kindergarden, yg guna English lebih sikit dari BM. Hmm, mana aku nak cari kat sini? Kalau bandar besar senanglah. Lepas tu nak guna psikologi pendidikan macam yg Wardina Safiyyah buat kat anak dia. Mampukah kami?

After all, anak aku ni baru je 5 bulan dalam rahim ni. Mummy dia baik punya berangan lebih kan. Of course la sebagai 1st mom-to-be... Eh, korang ada ke berangan macam aku ni?

A Boy or A Girl???

Soalan yg hari2 buat aku & husband bercakap. Happy bila husband suka borak2 dengan baby dalam perut. He pronounced himself as 'babah' & aku as 'mummy'. Suka je tengok husband usap2 perut cakap "Baby cepat besar ye, babah & mummy tak sabar nak main dgn baby.". 

Oh sekarang dah masuk 19 weeks. Cepat betul masa berlalu. This Saturday will enter 20 weeks. Good job. Alhamdulillah. I can enjoy my meals again. Serius badan aku naik banyak. Lepas tu Dr dah jadualkan aku untuk buat MGTT (minum air gula) Khamis ni. Aku dengar ramai yg kate yuksss. Iye ke? Ah, just nail it!

Perut dah makin showing. Sebab mana2 aku pergi bila bump into kawan2 diorang akan tanya, "Bila due?". Husband akan gelak cakap "Comeynya perut, bulat!!". Kebetulan aku pakai tshirt winnie the pooh, dan2 tu dia cakap perut aku macam pooh. Sabar je la kannnn...

Speaking of perut bulat, I have no idea how to describe perut bulat. Adik aku kata, "Besarnya perut. Macam boy jeeee...". Instinct aku sebagai seorang ibu pulak kata, dia ni baby boy sebab aku suka makan protein lately. Ayam, daging, ayam, daging. Aku ada jugak google, but I still dont have a clue.

Hujung Dec ni genap 6 bulan. So boleh jumpa Dr Murad buat 3D scan. Saje je ngade nak tau gender & tengok muka dia macam siapa. Aku rasa 1st mums mesti over excited kan. Yelah, haritu dengan overnya aku termasuk H&M kat avenue K masa conference kat KLCC minggu lepas. Dah termasuk tu takkan tengok je kannn.. Terus pegi section Kids dengan pantasnya. Aku pun kecundang & sempat grab romper set & cotton socks utk baby. Mummy pulak terpedaya dek godaan offer, Buy 1 get 1 free. Laju je grab beberapa helai blouse utk aku. Sebenarnya aku dah beriya2 ckp kat husband utk shopping barang baby bila masuk 6 bulan. Tapi kan, aku yg langgar syarat tu. Dengan alasan H&M takde kat Johorlah Yang.. pfft~

Korang rasa 21 weeks boleh fly international w/out surat Dr tak? Haritu fly domestik lepas je. Risau jugak aku. Ni yg nak kena pegi dapatkan surat ni. Sebab tak nak la vacation ni tergendala kan. We all dah lama plan nak bercuti hujung tahun. Lagipun melabur bukan sikit. Nantilah balik bercuti boleh update blog lagi. Lately malas nak menaip. Bam2 je keje aku sekarang ni.

The moment of truth

Hari 20 ogos 2013 aku demam. So petang husband bawa gi klinik panel. Bagitau kat Dr Jamaliah yg ada simptom2 pre-menstrual. Tapi tak period sampai 2 minggu. Bila buat urine test, Dr tunjuk 2 line appear. Serius aku blur. Speechless. Sebab aku ni kategori irregular. Gynae cakap aku ada PCOS. Tu yg masih perlukan treatment clomid. 

Bila keluar bilik Dr, terus tunjuk husband upt tu. Dia pun blur. Terus gi beli upt lagi utk repeat test. Tu pic yg bawah tu. Bila 2 line jugak, baru leh senyum. Alhamdulillah.. Alhamdulillah.. Alhamdulillah..

Didikan di Alam Rahim

Alhamdulillah, today is Friday. Siapa tak happy berseri2 di waktu pagi di ofis setiap pagi Jumaat? Aku nak kongsi sikit pasal didikan di alam rahim ni. Siapa tak nak anak yg cerdik & sihat kan.. Dari awal lagi semasa dalam kandungan pun dah banyak homework yg si ibu kena buat.

1) makan makanan sunnah/makanan yg Rasulullah gemar- susu kambing, kurma, madu, delima, kismis, kekacang

2) ambil nutrisi yg cukup- sila rujuk physician anda sebab nutrisi ibu2 mengandung ni tak sama

3) dekatkan diri kepada Allah- jaga solat, tambah dengan solat sunat, baca al-quran, dengar ayat2 suci al-quran (yang ni aku pun masih tak betul lagi. semoga Allah bukakan jalan utk aku)

4) elakkan pergi di tempat2 yang bising (konsert/pusat kareoke/panggung wayang/pesta2 hiburan spt jom heboh, astro planet gempak)

5) jaga percakapan, penglihatan & perbuatan (aku kalau driving sebelum ni memang suka menyumpah2. siapa yg tak sakit hati dgn attitude malaysian drivers? tapi sekarang bila nak marah je, terus istighfar sambil usap2 perut cakap,"Sorry baby, mummy tak nak buat dah. Baby jangan ikut macam tu ok.")

6) dapatkan rehat yang cukup (yg ni aku rasa mcm dah lebih pulak sebab aku ni dari zaman anak dara lagi memang pantang takde apa nak buat, berkeroh aku kat atas katil. buruk betul perangai kan..)

7) amalkan gaya hidup sihat & menjadi rajin (tak boleh bagi alasan, aku pregnant, tak boleh buat kerja rumahlah..mak aku selalu cakap, "Kalau tak rajin2, asyik baring je, baby boleh jadi besar.")

8) sentiasa keluarkan aura2 positif (bergaul dengan orang2 baik, jangan stres dan pakailah cantik2 & wangi ke tempat kerja/semasa keluar sebab ia akan mempengaruhi positive vibe tau)

Hello 2nd Trimester

Syukur, I'm 14w5d pregnant. Baby is doing fine. Last Saturday, junior midwife dropped by at our house around 10am. Without giving any notification! She didn't call me earlier. During weekends, I usually take late shower. Around 11-ish. I was in my kaftan (baju kelawar tidur tu) the moment she came and gave salam. Oh-oh.. I am in trouble. I was totally pissed-off. After 5 mins of rushing and got changed, I opened the door and welcomed her. Lucky me, it was a short visit. She recorded my blood pressure and measured my bump size. 

My appetite has recovered. But I choose my meal. Pulut, still rejected especially lemang. Chicken rendang, also out of my list. Curry noodle or oily broth? Sorry, I have to say no. To date, my morning sickness slowly subside. I rarely experience nauseous feeling and headache. Alhamdulillah. But back pain, is sometimes unbearable. 

Mummy now dah makin manja. In fact, sebelum preggy pun manja jugak. Husband pun layankan je. Tidur nak kena picit badan/pingggang/bahu. Baru lena tidur. Wekk, gedik! Ala... Biarlah kan. Time preggy la boleh manja2 macam ni. Esok2 dah ada baby, tak boleh buat perangai ngada2 gedik tu. 

My mom is so excited when my bump started to protrude. She talks about buying her future grandchild a Fisher Price bouncer, toys, mini playground, table and chairs. Actually, both moms are so excited. They always share their pregnancy and labour experience. 

I started to bid farewell to baju kurung, and say hello to maxi. Kain rasa ketat dan perut rasa senak. I can't breathe! I just can't wait for Dec. It's shopping time. Dah 6 bulan, baru boleh beli barang2 baby. Wah, bestnya! tengok blogshop or baby shop online pun geram je tangan rasa nak click 'Add to cart'. 

Don't Panic!

Panic #1:

Is my baby growing well?

This question always pop out from my mind. Yeah, as a mother-to-be for the very 1st time, i can't stop worrying about my fetus. If you are feeling the symptoms of pregnancy, morning sickness (anytime of day), gaining weight, if your stomach is growing and your breasts are tender, those are all good signs. But not all ladies will feel those things.

Bottom line, just keep calm and pray for both safety and health. Bukan ke belly dah start protruding? 

Panic #2:

Chapped lips and sometimes they bleed!

Pregnant women tend to experience this because our body need more liquid, retaining fluid and increasing blood flow. So stop licking your lips, and get more water. I do! I drink 1.5 L - 2.0 L of water daily. Even when I wake up in the mid of the night to pee, I must take one or two big gulps of water to top up.

Bottom line, I must drink a lot during hot weather. Sekarang siang2 panas terik kat area Johor. 

Panic #3:

Do every women in labour needs epidural? How about natural birth? How does it feel?

I have read some articles on taking epi during labour. After having some thoughts, I think I wanna go for natural birth. This is because epidural has bad effects on both mother and child. But how can I be so sure? I have zero labour experience. You know what scares me? It is during post-natal stitching. Am I going to be given anesthetics? Or will the gynae/midwives just stitch my perineum without giving any warnings? My oh my..

Bottom line, I must massage my perineum area with virgin coconut oil after 30 weeks and do Kegel exercise to make giving birth easier.

Panic #4:

Can the nurses of general hosp be nice to me during pre and post-natal?

This really concerns me. People will always make foolish notion about general hosp nurses. Are they that bad and nasty? I always ask my friends how 'garang' the nurses are. But they just deny the fact because nurses back in early 90s were mostly old and 'banyak membebel' compared to newschool nurses. There are more young and kind nurses nowadays. I hope they will treat me well and nicely. 

Bottom line, I opt to deliver my baby at general hosp and husband can take care of me there and I have a ticket that goes like, "I am a wife of a staff in Pathology Dept. Please don't be 'garang' to me!"

Short Update

Lama tak tulis apa2 kat blog.
Lately nak menaip tu rasa 'bercinta' sangat.
Sekarang dah masuk 3 bulan.
Tak sabar nak masuk 2nd trim.
Tapi perut dah makin obvious.
Dah ada orang yg tegur perut nampak besar.
"Jangan2 ada 2 tak?"
"Ish, takdelah kak, haritu scan nampak 1 je, lagipun takde genetik kembar."

Lately, dah malas nak pakai baju kurung.
Kain tu buat perut rasa senak.
So, end up dengan beli maxi poplook banyak2.
Best je pakai maxi sebab rasa loose.
Kalau kat rumah pun tak best dah pakai seluar ni.
Suka lagi pakai kaftan.
Janji perut aku happy. Eh?

Alhamdulillah, selera makan adah ada.
Cuma kadang2 tu memilih.
Dah muak sebenarnya makan lauk2 kedai ni.
So haritu request kat husband minta tolong goreng2 kan nasi dan bihun.
Bukan ngade2 tau, tapi aku tak boleh bau tumis2 ni.
Weekend pun breakfast nak yg homemade jugak.

Aku terfikir esok2 kalau aku nak deliver kat hosp gov,
masa buat stitching tu diorang bius tak?
Aku tak nak fikir sakit contraction masa bersalin.
Sebab aku dah tak sabar nak cepat bagi baby lahir.
Tak sabar nak golek2 dengan baby.

Kalau aku beranak kat gov,
sebab husband aku staf sana,
Bolehlah nurse2 tu bagi extra care kat aku.
Wad pun boleh upgrade yg best.
Tapi...tapi...tapi...
Dah pernah cakap kat husband,
"Yang, utk deliver kali pertama ni, nak gi kat KPJ la."
Husband pun ok je.
Tapi bila fikir balik kalau aku tiba2 kena emergency c-sect?
Mestilah bil lagi mahal.
Lagipun company aku hanya boleh cover ubat2 je. =_="

Hm, hm.. Nak beli maternity pillow ah.
Nak tidur sekarang kemain payah nak cari pose terbaik.
Selalu mengiring tapi nak kena sendal bantal kat spine.
Jadi, haruslah dapatkan 1 segera!
Hai lah mata, kenapa asyik ngantuk2 je ni?
Memang preggy macam tu eh?
Rasa nak bam-bam je.

Oh, aku dah tak minum Anmum dah.
Walaupun perasa mango bagai.
Sebab aku lebih favor susu kambing hi-goat.
Tapi masa nak conceive pun aku memang amalkan.
Orang cakap panas. Ye ke?
Aku minum susu je kot bukan makan daging kambing.
Tapi yg pasti ramai kawan2 aku cakap susu kambing bagus,
anak inshaAllah tak mudah kena jaundice.
Plus, aku ni darah B+, Dr aku cakap orang2 darah B bagus minum susu kambing.

Lagi 1, sekarang dah kena rajin buat latihan Maths
atau apa2 soalan berbentuk IQ.
Ala, simple Maths pun takpe.
Jangan korang buat Addmaths F4/F5,
lagi stress hoi..
Korang tau kenapa orang Yahudi pandai2?
Sebab masa mak diorang pregnant, mak diorang rajin buat Maths, makan kekacang.
So, tak salah kalau kita ambil contoh perkara yg baik mcm ni kan?

Eh, tadi tajuk kata 'Short Update',
ni dah panjang lak.
Ok, bai.

Mengidam Story

I called it 'mengidam' as I am now entering 10w4d pregnant.

Last week we were at my parents'.

I was craving for kari ikan utara style with lotsa okra & pekasam aloq staq.

Lucky me, as I reached home, mama had cooked those for me.
Bukan main selera makan, selalu tengok nasi nak tak nak je.

Thank you mama, I love u to the max!

On the other hand, I was craving for sukun goreng & aiskrim malaysia asam boi.

Alhamdulillah, ada rezeki.

Only homemade soy milk is still on the list.

I refuse to drink soy milk from the stores.

Preservatives are no good for both of us.

One thing I did notice is that ever since I got pregnant,

I love to stare & look deeply at my husband.

Even at the office, I just browse my photo folder and look at his face (smilling).

Rindu suami setiap saat.

Eeee, gedik tak?

Come on, dear lil one inside me.

Please have a speedy growth.

Mummy can't wait to hug u!

Heartbeat

Alhamdulillah, i managed to register at Klinik Ibu & Anak.
Glad that I am now entering motherhood.
To my surprise, the Dr said that I am now 9w4d pregnant according to my fetus size.
I thank Allah as I saw my fetus heartbeat.
Subhanallah, Allah dah tiupkan roh ke atas kandunganku.
"Tengok heartbeat dia, laju. Awak nampak?"
Aku angguk je sebab macam tak percaya.
I hope my morning sickness will go soon.
I can't wait to indulge again my favorite dishes.

Alahan

I am 7 weeks 5 days pregnant.
Alhamdulillah.
Aku dapati sejak pregnant ni, habit aku dah berubah.
Ok, dulu aku sukakan makanan pedas.
Sekarang, tak leh pedas langsung, terus rasa loya, perut pun jadi tak selesa.
Sekarang aku sensitif kat cahaya terang.
Sebab aku pening, lepas tu jadi loya.
Kat office pun aku bukak 1 lampu je.
Monitor komputer aku off bila tunggu email masuk.
Pagi2 nak mandi pun aku sanggup tak bukak lampu toilet.
Biar pintu toilet renggang sikit, asal cahaya lampu bilik boleh masuk.
Ala, lagipun kami berdua je. So, takde risau orang nak tengok aku mandi.
Iklan makanan kat TV or any food channels (AFC, LI, Food Network) dah aku banned.
Sebab aku boleh loya.

Ya Allah, pagi2 kat office je aku jadi sayur.
Memang minyak angin sentiasa ada kat tangan.
Pagi2 duduk diam2 kat meja, sambil picit2 kepala.
Kadang2, bila teruk sangat, aku minta time-off.
Aku harap Allah beri kekuatan pada aku untuk trimester yg paling mencabar ni.
Kadang2 bila dah rasa flat sangat, boleh pulak cakap kat husband yg aku sanggup nak amik drip.

Minggu depan dah 2 bulan.
Harap2 hujung2 trimester 1 ni dah ok segala sickness.
Ohhh, pening lagi.
Ok, bai!

Kononnya

Konon-kononnya nak stay silence la dari officemate pasal pregnancy ni. Ternyata aku tak boleh elak. Kantoi sebab cara jalan aku totally berubah. Yelah, makcik2 yg ada experience beranak 3-4 kali dah tau aku ni pregnant walaupun aku tak buka mulut pun, unless kalau orang tanya. Hm..nampak gayanya tak leh nak sorok sebab cara jalan pun dah kantoi. Hihi.

Nak tau apa yg lain cara jalan wanita yg mengandung & tak mengandung? Paling obvious is, your bump is getting bigger & rounder. Sebab tulang pelvis mula berubah untuk sokong kandungan anda. Ada paham?

Husband pun tegur, Haahlah, lain dah Yang punya bump. Besar. Hikhik, seksi ape? 

First Experience Flying During First Trimester

Alhamdulillah. Semuanya selamat. Memang berdebar nak naik flight from JB to Miri return dengan 1 kali transit. Ya Allah, seksa betul menunggu lama bila flight delay. Perasaan tu nak cepat2 sampai rumah berehat atas katil sendiri. Masa nak take off, ok lagi. Paling risau bila nak landing. Gegaran tu terpaksa aku tahan. Kesian kat baby. Risau sangat sebab dia kecik lagi. Haritu sebelum fly dah 2 Dr yg kami jumpa utk confirm adakah selamat utk fly. Masa dlm flight dari KL-Miri, 2 jam 10 minit lamanyaaaaa. Terpaksa endure pening2 loya, dgn bau makanan yg dihidang. Tak sedap ok, I almost puked! Entahlah, bagi aku sekarang ni kalau dihidang makanan paling sedap kat dunia pun, aku tetap pilih buah2an. Lagi2 kalau chilled. Nyaman rasa.

Sehingga hari ni, Ribena/Orange juice, buah epal dah ready siap2 dalam beg. Minyak angin wajib bawa. Perasaan tu kalau boleh memang tak nak makan langsung, sebab loya. Tapi memikirkan baby, kesian. dia berhak dapat nutrien yg cukup. Sorry baby, I was my fault. Ya Allah, pls help me to endure all this. And safe us from any harm. Ameen.

Pengalaman Baru

Alhamdulillah, Allah maha mendengar rintihan kami.
Last period bln Jun haritu, sangat tak jangka rupa2nya dah pregnant 4 minggu.
Aku dah rasai pengalaman org2 mengandung ni.
Tengah malam, tekak akan loya, so botol air kena standby tepi katil.
Pagi pulak rasa lapar, makan roti + minum susu kambing pun dah cukup kenyang.
Lunch pulak makan nasi macam 2 hari tak makan nasi.
Lepas habis makan, kepala pening & tekak rasa loya.
Padahal makan nasi banyak untuk lunch macam takde ape2 je.
Malam pulak selera makan dah kurang.
Makan buah pun dah cukup kenyang.
Lepas makan malam, kepala dah ok, tak pening dah.
Bila nak tidur, cramp & sakit belakang.
Sekarang makin cepat mengantuk.
Kul 11 je dah naik katil, golek2 sampai tertidur.

Walau apa pun, aku tetap happy sepanjang pregnancy ni.
Semoga Allah lindungiku dan kandunganku.
Risau jugak Isnin ni nak pegi Serawak untuk seminar.
Baby ikut mummy kerja naik flight.

The Unexpected

I was waiting for my AF to visit me last Ramadhan. The truth is, my gynae would like to continue my fertility treatment after Raya. My previous correctional cycle (after 4 Clomid cycles) was 40-43 days. And I was hoping that AF will appear on that particular date. A week after my period was estimated to come, I had this normal PMS symptoms; sore breasts, cramps, mood swings. Ah, it is just normal symptom! I kept saying that. The period  didn't show up until 14days. My period must be irregular this time. 3 days later, my lower back started to hurt at night. I asked husband to rub my back with citronella balm. The cramp was getting more intense. It was difficult to put myself to sleep. 

I could not go to work on 20 Aug 2013. So, that evening, after work, husband brought me to seek for medical attention. I went to see Dr Jamaliah. I told her about my PMS symptoms, later on, she asked me to sample my urine. After 5 mins, she showed me the 2 miracle lines that I was always hoping. My UPT is positive after 15 months of marriage.

Allahuakbar..Allahuakbar...Allahuakbar... Allah has answered our prayers. Dr Jamaliah also showed me my 1st baby-in-the-making ultrasound picture. I can see a tiny sac in my womb. She suggested me to come for another ultrasound after 2 weeks.

To date, I have experienced nausea, frequent urination, cramps, back pain, fruit cravings. I hope Allah will ease my pregnancy journey. Ameen..

Dream Honeymoon Spot

Husband cakap someday mesti pegi Bali. Yay!


♥ Nina

A Brand New Blog

Peace be upon you.
This is a brand new blog with a brand new hope.
I dedicate this to my future children.
I will share my own experience, thoughts and ramblings.
Feel free to visit and leave a comment.



♥ Nina